Being on the Same Side

Another excellent article by Vickie at Demand Euphoria.

When we treat our children as if we are at war with them (“Don’t negotiate with terrorists!), everybody loses.

Update:

Wow, and Vickie has another great one today:  Choosing Your Guide.  Imagine you were going on a hike, and you could choose between two guides: one controlling and bossy, and the other neglectful and uncaring. Then imagine you could choose a third guide, who planned the trip with you and was pleasantly cooperative throughout:

 

She will offer to help when she notices you are struggling, no matter how easy or hard it looks to her. Sometimes she might get distracted and get ahead of you, but she will notice quickly, come back, and apologize. She will stop whenever you want, to eat, drink, rest, or explore. Mona doesn’t worry about whether either one of you will finish the hike. She’s just enjoying the adventure with you.

Who would you go hiking with?

Now think about this: you invited your child into this world, and she didn’t get to choose her guide. So it’s up to you. Thank goodness, you don’t have to choose between being controlling and being neglectful. There is another way. It looks like Mona’s style.